Listen up, ladies. Y'all just don't know how hard it is to be a working dad these days.
We're expected to do it all. Raise the little ones, pay the bills, look "sexy," be assertive in our career (but not too assertive), and somehow get it all done in time to have dinner on the table for the wife and kids.
Wait. That doesn't sound right.
Real talk: Being a parent of any gender is really hard, but it's the moms who get all the extra pressure and all the horrible advice that goes along with it.
Seriously, go Google "tips for working moms," start reading, and try not to break something. There's oodles of advice out there for everything, from how to stay organized, to how to make time for your avocado-filled beauty routine, to how to set proper boundaries at work.
Most of it is well-meaning and all, but you can't help but wonder, what would it look like if we tried to give this same kind of advice to working dads?
A hilarious parody Twitter account recently began skewering this kind of misguided advice for moms, and it's a must-follow.
The tweeter known as @manwhohasitall began tweeting in August and has shared over 3,200 delightful nuggets of wisdom since then. (Working dads sure do need a lot of help!)
In his or her own words, the author (who wanted to remain anonymous ... and in character, at that) told Welcometoterranova, "I offer supportive lifestyle advice for the frazzled working dad juggling housework, kids, job, 'me time' and truly great skin."
It's got something for everyone, including cleverly disguised thoughts on the unbelievably low standards we set for dads who "help" with the kids...
Why we feel that women somehow need permission to have confidence...
Some fantastic advice on how to spend our precious "me time" (the author prefers to spend theirs "in a candlelit bubble bath with a full glass of water and maybe an almond")...
And plenty more. Just enjoy these for a moment:
"I'll be honest with you," the author told Welcometoterranova. "It's tough being a working dad. There's so much pressure to look good, keep a perfect house, and stay hydrated."
Once you've recovered from rolling on the floor laughing, you don't have to look too hard to see the underlying point here.
Go check out the rest of these amazing "tips." And when you're done with that, be sure to reward yourself with some much needed "me time."
I'll be spending mine scrubbing the floor, exfoliating, and chanting self-affirmations.